Etiquette 101

by Jill

Two of my favorite people in the world (Hi, Sean and Kristen!) are getting married on September 2nd and I’m honored to be part of their wedding party. As a result of this, many of my recent thoughts have involved bridal showers, bachelorette festivities and bridal luncheons. Of course I love it all, but I’ve had a few concerns about proper etiquette and the Do’s and Don’ts of hosting these events, especially with Kristen’s bridal shower, which I’m throwing on Sunday afternoon with 2 of my fellow bridesmaids, Grace Marie and Mallory. After consulting Google and multiple bridal shower etiquette web sites, I finally have all the answers I need! Take notes incase you’re ever in the position to throw a bridal shower!

Who throws a bridal shower?
• Traditionally, bridal shower etiquette suggests that the bridesmaids are responsible for throwing a bridal shower. Close family members are not supposed to handle the celebration, but some brides simply do not have anyone else who is willing to host the party. In this scenario, anyone can give a bridal shower, but close family should generally step back if there are other people would wish to organize the bridal shower.

Where should a bridal shower be held?
• When it comes to location, bridal shower etiquette does not single out any one specific place to hold the shower. Ideally, however, bridal showers that are held at a restaurant must be fully paid for by the hostess. If this is beyond the budget, plan another location as bridal shower etiquette does suggest that guests should never be asked to pay for their own meal.

DO get everyone involved.
• It’s proper for the maid of honor and bridesmaid to throw the shower, but make sure everyone attending the shower feels included. For example, ask each person to take on some responsibility, whether it is recording a list of the gifts and givers as they are opened or organizing the group for games.

DON’T feel like you have to invite everyone the bride knows.
• A bridal shower is supposed to be a small, intimate gathering of the bride’s closest friends and family. Proper bridal shower etiquette dictates a group of no more than ten to twenty guests.

DO throw the shower 1-2 months prior to the wedding.
• However, there is no rule that says a shower cannot be held earlier, with the most important deciding factor being whether or not the bride can attend.

DON’T ask guests to give cash gifts.
• This is tacky and in poor taste. You will offend your guests if you do this. Most people don’t want the recipients of their gifts to know how much they spent or did not spend.

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